Sad Realities

Every mother at some point reaches a point where they have to think in the best interest of their child whether they want to or not. At the age of 14 I met the guy who is now my oldest daughter's father. I was 16&pregnant and at 17 I became a mother for the first time. It wasn't a cake walk because my daughter was born 4 months early and weighed only 2 pounds. Now she's 5 about to be 6 and I can honestly say without the help of family she wouldn't be the strong smart mouthed little girl she is today. My daughter has been here almost 6 years and her dad has never done a thing for her. I can probably count on my hands and toes the amount of times he's ever seen her. I've tried to get him involved but I've learned you can't make a man who doesn't want to be a dad be one. And that's not what I want to do. the problem with this situation is that my daughter knows she has a daddy. She sees her sister with her dad, she sees my sisters with their dad, and even me with my own father. So all she knows is that she doesn't have one. And the saddest thing a child can ever do is come to their mom and ask why isn't my daddy around? Does he even care about me? I used t be able to answer that question but recently I can't because I'm not sure of the answer myself. I used to be able to say that he's away but that's not the case anymore. He's not away anymore and its the same cycle again. So I'm faced with looking at the sadness in my daughter's eyes and wanting to slap the black off my baby's father. I'm doing like many single mom's are doing though. Dealing with it. This isn't usually what I post about but its something that's been on my chest for a while now. Feels good to let it go.

Throwback Tuesday

His Kids...Your kids

Situation: You try hard to get your child's father involved in their life. You two aren't together and he moved on and he went off and had another child with another woman. He takes care of that child and her other kids better than he takes care of the child you two have together and your child can see this as well. Your child starts asking you where is daddy and why did daddy leave them for a new family?

What you want to do: Go to his house and cuss him and his new girlfriend out. Tell him that he's nothing but a sorry son of a b*tch.

What you should do: Try calmly telling him that he's making his child feel unloved and that he should try and spend more time with him/her. Let the child write a letter or call him on his/her own to express their feelings.

Wild Out Music Wednesday

Communication pt.1

Scenario: You call for your child to talk to their dad. He doesn't answer. You leave a message and send him a text to please call you back because your child back because they want to talk to him. A couple of days go by and you call again and he still won't answer or return of your messages but you find out he's been on Facebook or online every other day from his mobile phone.

What you want to do: Get on his Facebook wall and write that he is a trifling son of a b*tch and you know that he sees you calling him so that y'all child can talk to him and that he isn't shit and you wish he would call you talking about his phone been broke or he been busy because he had enough time to get his ass online.

What you should do: Remain as calm as you can and tell your child that their dad is unavailable at the moment. (Even if that's not the case.) When you finally get in contact with their dad don't spazz out on them. just be like our child really wanted to talk to you and was disappointed that you didn't return their phone call. If he argues just say call me when you want to act like an adult or just hand your child the phone.

Bonquesha Files: Sugar

Sugar in the gas tank. Everybody knows what this does. It messes the entire car up. I wouldn't advise anyone to do this especially single mothers. You wouldn't want to do this to your baby daddy's car because how is he going to pick your child up? And if he sees you do it or you brag about it to everybody you know you know who's going to have to come out of pocket? Yeah that's right..YOU!!! If he doesn't already come and visit your child fine get over it. You can't force any man to be a dad if he doesn't want to be. If he's financially supporting your child though and you mess up his car. Then there goes that income because now he's walking to work. Think about your actions. Don't let any man make you look like a fool.

Words Owl Fridays!!!

Don't judge a book by its cover because the next chapter you read may be a reflection of yourself..